To begin at the end.

I've been needing to write this blog for awhile, so here goes. I was pretty bummed by summer ending. Usually I can motivate myself somehow to be excited for school and new experiences, but I think I could have done with a few more weeks of real freedom. I guess part of my reluctance involved the knowledge that this was my last official summer before "life" begins, with its vast array of jobs and responsibilities. Sigh. But as always, I've dealt with it and moved on.

The school year thus far has proved nothing dramatic--besides meeting some new people and friends (Clarence, Curt, Tusk, et al.)--it's been pretty straightforward. My editing classes are going well and, thanks to the crash course in editing my internship has given me, have been somewhat a review. For my magazine publishing class, we have the chance to work closely with the editors of BYU Magazine; our first two writing assignments are geared toward possible acceptance for publication by them, which I think is really cool. Plus, we get the inside scoop on editorial decisions, upcoming stories and issues, and basically an insider's look at the mag publishing process. They've even created a blog for us to discuss things outside class with the editors. It's awesome. My English class is likewise amazing. The professor, Dr. Talbot, was one of my mentors in England, and his class, which focuses on how English writers appropriated Classical (read Greek and Roman) writers for their own material, is so great. Since Talbot knows both classical Greek and Latin, the class truly is a learning experience. I like his traditional, yet quirky, Oxfordian style, and might take his 495 class this winter that deals with the same subject.

One thing I know I must tell you, and that is how my internship has been an absolute, freaking dream. I never imagined that I would learn or do as much as I have learned and done. Everything from editing apostles' books to writing jacket copy. It's been such a humbling experience that I know I am so lucky to have. Reading as much as I do of others' writing, I am so grateful for the particular skills and talents I was given--to make communication clearer between people is a dream job for me, and I guess I take for granted how easy it comes for me. Not to toot my own horn or anything...

For the second part of this blog, I want to write an apology. I know that sometimes I'm not the easiest person to be around, particularly when I let annoying situations get to me, and to other people that translates into me being mad at them. One thing you should know, is that if I am mad at you, I will either tell you or, most likely, resolve it within myself and move on. But that's not so easy when it comes to things I can't control or let myself become a victim of. If I'm mad and act like I'm ignoring you, chances are I'm just staying away because I know I'm a crappy person to be around at the moment and don't want to do or say anything that will make you mad at me. If I don't open up to you it's for one of a number of reasons: (1) I don't trust you, (2) I don't think it's big enough of a deal to let you in, (3) I don't want to bug you, etc. So don't take it personally; I'm a pretty introspective person anyway and like to think I can handle stuff on my own. So. Crash course in Rachel one-oh-one, right? Haha.

I will fill you in on one thing, though, because I could probably use some external encouragement to fulfill this goal. I've decided to not be so picky when it comes to relationships. And I mean this in the best way possible. I'm not by any means going to date the first guy that walks in the room; all I mean is that I know I can be impossible sometimes with my, uh, requirements, and I know this isn't right. I think it's ridiculous when guys are impossible in their requirements, so this is me jumping off the hypocrisy bandwagon. I need to start accepting the dates I get asked out on, and not worry so much that he wears plaid button-up shirts every Tuesday and Thursday, or if he hasn't heard of Radical Face or Sea Wolf. Ok, so this may take some work. But I guess I'm just tired of finding the "perfect" guy only to find out he doesn't date/has a girlfriend/insert another random issue here. The let down is so much harder at times like those. In a few words, I just need to chill and take things as they come. I'm just tired of relationships being the biggest source of sadness for me in my life. (Well, that and missing England, which is a given constant.)

A final note, and then I'm off. Most of the people who read this blog aren't on MySpace, so I'm re-issuing the plea to you that I made there: I need advice of the musical (and dare I say, the most important) kind.

Every Tuesday and Thursday I spend a lot of time driving in the car, and I am in desperate need of new music to get me through said sojourns. I'd really appreciate your suggestions. Not your souls here, people, just your suggestions.

Or if anyone feels so inclined, sending a carefully crafted mix my way wouldn't be too shabby either. ;) But tell me who you think I should listen to, no matter how eclectic/weird you might think they are.

Thanks loves!

P.S. Persons sending country and/or rap "music" suggestions will be mocked and summarily shunned. Sorry. Kinda.