Who Needs the Gym When You Can Shovel Snow For Four Hours?

My arms hurt.




Merry Christmas!

It's Christmas Eve!

Last night I had a dream that my mom bought Abby (my golden retriever) her own dog for a pet. It was really funny to dream-watch Abby getting her dog water and food and playing with her. One of my favorite parts of Christmas vacation has been taking Abby for long walks in the snow, especially on the golf course behind our house. She rolls around in the snow like a bear and makes growling noises. It's pretty hilarious.

I am really thankful it's Christmas Eve; tonight my family and I are going to our traditional Christmas feast with the Erbs, who we've been friends with for over ten years. This year The Feast is at their mansion house at Suncrest, which will be nice because right now I'm tired of entertaining at our house.

The Feast consists of prime rib, crab legs, cheesy potatoes, rolls, mom's ribbon salad, and green salad. The Feast never changes--we have the same thing every year, and every year is better than the last. For dessert we have Christmas cookies, and some kind of cake or brownies or chocolate covered strawberries. Yes, divine. I feel spoiled to have such good family friends and such an awesome tradition.

Seeing stars.

Today before I fell asleep for a Sunday nap I saw little blue stars in the air in front of me. It was really weird. So I took a three hour nap and I woke up really refreshed and thinking clearly.

This Christmas break so far has been really restful--my body cannot get enough sleep, it seems. I need to take better care of myself this next semester, especially since it's my last. Speaking of graduating, I found out some good news today: I might graduate summa cum laude. At the very least cum laude. It's kinda nice to know that all my hard work during college will pay off in something as intangible as saying I graduated with honors. Okay it's more than kinda nice. :)

Oh yeah, I have two album recommendations. They're both folk, so if you're not into it I'm sorry, these probably aren't for you. The first one is Ferraby Lionheart. His Catch the Brass Ring is great, but I prefer his EP. How I would describe his music is the feeling of being alive again after realizing you've been dead for awhile. The other album is Peter Sarstedt's The Lost Album. Pure, unadulterated modern folk. Loves to all and I hope your holiday season is restful and full of love.

"Without plagiarism, there would be no literature."

I had a friend in high school with whom I could talk about a lot of things, one of them being literature. Since he is not available to talk to anymore, here is what I would have talked to him about regarding my classics in English literature class.

Christopher Logue's project of translating The Iliad is astounding. War Music is the most important poem of this century--and Logue doesn't know a word of Greek. In his project, he combines not only Homer, Virgil, Ovid, Milton, and Pope, but also a number of English poets like Pound and Eliot. The latest book, All Day Permanent Red, contains only the battles scenes from The Iliad--and Logue took the title from a Revlon lipstick ad. I love how he combines the epic conventions and their subsequent reception into English literature with pop culture references. His style is the most overt modern influence. If Cecil B. DeMille did The Iliad, Logue would be the screenwriter. His style is essentially cinematic, which ultimately speaks to our modern aesthetic and mindset--the lapses into present tense, the quick cuts, the reliance on montage, the emphasis of the visual all imply a silver-screen behind the words. Logue's work has the sweep of epic cinema and the cadence of epic poetry, which is what makes it successful.

I think what it comes down to is that it's the meaning, not the name, that is important. Milton first brought this up when he talks about how the gods of pagan religions are really the devils cast out of heaven with Satan (whose name, incidentally, becomes synonymous with Achilles, Aeneas, Hephaestus, and other classical figures), and the pagans just got the names wrong. The meaning behind Logue's anachronistic project is to convey the truth The Iliad tells about "the propensity to violence in human males." Civil war will always be civil war, it's only the names and dates that change over time. Whether it's the civil war in heaven or the English Civil War during Milton's time, people will always find a reason to rebel and as always, the victors will write (or rewrite) the story.

And Logue says it more powerfully, is able to even say it at all, because of the classical source texts and the history of their reception by English writers.

That's all I'm trying to say.

Tagged.

My lovely friend Aric Johnstone hath tagged me. Here we go!

8 Favorite T.V. Shows--
1. The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
2. Family Guy
3. Scrubs
4. Flight of the Conchords
5. 30 Rock
6. Invader Zim
7. What Not to Wear
8. Samurai Jack

8 Favorite Restaurants--
1. Market Street Grill
2. Ruth's Chris Steakhouse
3. Cucina Toscana
4. Mikado's
5. Ned's Noodle Bar
6. Guru's
7. Kahn's
8. Zupas

8 Things to Look Forward To--
1. My List
2. The next change in season
3. Having kids
4. Graduating
5. Returning to London
6. Having money to give away to people who really need it
7. The rain
8. "That guy"--Trust me, I've dreamed about him enough times to know him when I meet him :)

8 Things I LOVE about winter--
1. Wood-burning stoves and the smell outside that comes from them
2. Comfy sweaters
3. Boots
4. Looking forward to the New Year
5. Being with family
6. The stars--they're extra clear during the winter, esp. Orion
7. Sledding/skiing/snow activities in general
8. Buying presents for people

8 Things on my wishlist-
1. Michael Kors watch
2. A secure future
3. To be able to talk to people from the past without any awkwardness
4. To not be an awkward person...
5. A comfy homemade blanket
6. More sleep
7. #4 on my List
8. Socks

Now I tag these people:

I wanna tag these great 8:
1. J'nae
2. Tanner
3. Cub
4. Derek
5. Ash
6. Kasey
7. Kristin
8. Makayla

La terre vue du ciel.

If I were in Geneva right now, this is the art exhibit I would go to. It is absolutely stunning. I am considering renaming this blog to yannisgod.blogspot.com, which would be ironically fitting.


Oh, and my tummy hurts. :(

Dang economy.

Today I went into work and was doing my thing, evaluating a manuscript for Lisa (internship mentor/associate editor) and talking to Suzanne (senior editor) about upcoming projects for the day, when Suzanne informed me that the week before Thanksgiving a ton of people had been laid off. I was kind of in shock because it was mostly people I knew. I'll particularly miss Jay, the other senior editor, as well as Fielding, the nice old man who said hi to me every morning. The publishing industry has taken quite a blow because of the economy--Conde Nast and Time Warner have both laid off about 500,000 people each within the last three months.

Amidst all this economic worry, Suzanne asked me if I wanted to help with a freelance job of hers--for $25 an hour! I said yes, of course. The chance to work with one of the top 5 editors in Utah (and there are more than you may think here) is an honor in itself, let alone to be paid to assist with a project outside of my internship. I've become really close to her in the past couple weeks, and I'll be really sad to leave. She's an Anglophile like me, so of course we hit it off right away.

So bad news and good news today; I'm exhausted out of my mind but I feel pretty accomplished.

I hath found my calling.

Rachel Spohn: Writer of Random Crap.

Ok, so what I write isn't crap. But it is random. I'm sorry, but my articles are actually pretty good considering the limitations I'm under. Today I started writing for the SEO company and it is so much fun. I wrote three tonight. The topics were finding a good home builder, tips for hiring executives, and eco gifts for the environmentally conscious. Like I said, random, but so much fun. I made thirty bucks tonight that I didn't have before! Woot.

Once they get approved, you can go read them on www.ezinearticles.com. Just search for my name and they should come up.

P.S. Listen to MGMT's song "Kids." I can't stop. It makes me wanna dance!

Ghazel.

I wanted to run at the sign of the end
as the man unraveled the twine at the end.

Hurt, your throat closes and hears consuming fire
My ears do not feel what you whine when you end.

What would your wish be, if you could choose to stay?
Gripped by a torrent of earth, we find our end.

Job, struck down by trials, on all sides destroyed,
his sons and daughters drinking wine at the end.

Hopeless, Why die I not from the womb? he asks,
Man, born for trials, confined by hurt that ends.

They happen to mortals in a fallen world
Smells of trees in the wind remind to the end.

As time, healer of naught, grinds Rachel to dust
We run, hoping for some kind line in the end.

Crazy week.

This week I'm staying with Derek while my parents are sipping fruity drinks on a beach in Mexico. My schedule's been pretty insane, but it's nothing I can't handle. On Sunday I took my parents to the airport (5:30 am!), then went to church with Derek, Cara, and Clarence. After church we made stuffed french toast, eggs, and sausage for dinner. That night we did homework together and then played Clue--Cara and I bought it at Wal-Mart for $10. We went to bed pretty late, so I was exhausted the next morning when I had to get Derek off to school before driving to Provo with Cara for class. My classes were pretty normal; luckily I'm ahead on my homework, or else this week would be even crazier. After class I drove to American Fork for a job interview. Half an hour later I was hired as a content writer for OrangeSoda.
I'm really excited. The best part about the job is I get to work at my own pace writing articles and content for websites, and I never have to go into the office. It's nice to have a steady job finally.

My internship is going really well; I was busy today trying to get an index updated for a book that has to go to press Thursday. There have been a lot of problems lately with this book and I have to go in tomorrow as well in order to make sure it goes to press on time. I love working at Deseret Book because I feel like everything I'm working on is really important and I learn so much from having to read them all. I'm trying to compile a list of all the books I've worked on so far so I can buy them. I like the idea of having a copy of everything I've worked on.

The rest of this week is pretty straightforward. My parents come home on Thursday, and Gully Lights is playing at Velour at 8 pm. I'm so excited to see them play! They're really good live.

We should bring back mix tapes.

I'm talking mix tapes of the caliber found in High Fidelity or Hairstyles of the Damned. Yes. I've been making a lot of mixes for work lately, and since I have nothing else to blog about, I'll share the track listings of one mix with you...song name first, followed by artist. P.S. I don't believe in the whole "You can't have the same artist twice" nonsense. Nonsense. As long as they're not consecutive, you're fine.

Mix title: Not Again

1. Welcome Home, Radical Face
2. Faintest of Sparks, Amandine
3. Apologize (If You Tried), Buddy
4. The Echoing Airports, The One AM Radio
5. Michigan, Ambulance Ltd
6. Fiery Crash, Andrew Bird
7. Meadowlake Street, Ryan Adams & The Cardinals
8. No Heart, Buddy
9. Le loire et cher, Girls In Hawaii
10. Days Go On, Greg Laswell
11. The Temptation of Adam, Josh Ritter
12. Polyester, Maximilian Hecker
13. Fake Empire, The National
14. In The Time We've Got, The One AM Radio
15. Wrapped in Piano Strings, Radical Face
16. Say A Lot, Buddy
17. Heart Tremor, Amandine
18. Crystal Selves, Alive In Wild Paint
19. You're A Wolf, Sea Wolf
20. 11/22, Buddy


Anyway.

I'm pining away.

No, not for any old boy, but for a city--London. I was in the middle of getting ready for bed and it hit me how much I wish I was there now, waking up in the early morning. My dog and I would take a walk in Kensington Garden or Hyde Park before breakfast. After tramping and exploring the damp pathways of these parks, we would pick out a nice table at Caffe Nero and have breakfast while reading The Guardian.

I miss Hampstead Heath and Camden. I miss the smelly Tube and being carried along by the crowds on Oxford Street. I miss Southwark and Borough Market. I miss the history and my ward and the light. I miss the rain in the morning and going to museums for free. I miss knowing Stonehenge is 90 miles to the west, and being able to be go to Paris for a weekend. I miss my city.

For clarity's sake.

If you're anything like me, then politics has always been both a passion and a frustration. To help shed some light on the game for us all, I'm recommending votesmart.org. It presents clear and, most importantly, unbiased information on the issues, candidates, and their policies. Happy voting!

Paper is poetry.

One of my many obsessions is paper--its history, design, making, etc. all qualify as things that make my heart flutter. So imagine my excitement when I found out Orange Beautiful (see link at right) sells their products on etsy. I love this company's designs and will definitely be buying some new notecards asap.

"The play's the thing."

It's random quote from Hamlet day; a hearty slap on the back to whomever can finish the title of this blog--no peeking! And Ash, you can't play. People who teach the lit cannot play the lit games. ;)

I was cleaning out some old computer files today and found some great stuff. Old IM conversations with Jake, story ideas from high school...everything from my four-years-ago self who I hardly recognize. Since we seem to be doing quotes today, here are some goodies I found in my files for you to digest. I love the three "why's" in the first one. Heartbreaking.


I know someday you'll have a beautiful life
I know you'll be a star, in somebody else's sky
But why, why, why can't it be mine?

Pearl Jam, "Black"

You'll learn from them—if you want to. Just as someday, if you have something to offer, someone will learn something from you. It's a beautiful reciprocal arrangement. And it isn't education. It's history. It's poetry.

JD Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

And I love this one from the author of the French children's book, Le petit prince:

Love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction.

Antoine Saint-Exupery


So there you have it. I've got nothing else. My stomach hasn't been hurting, which is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing because it's nice to feel normal, and a curse because of what it might mean. Curse you, gluten gods!

Getting all inspired and...stuff.

Today there was a deer on campus. Most likely by accident, I'm thinking. It's not like Cecil was there with a lead rope saying, "Isn't BYU great? We have deer." Nowai. I was sorely tempted to give her my apple, but then I remembered that the apple was organic and I was excited to eat it and that the deer would probably take a chunk out of my arm as thanks. "Thanks for the apple."Chomp! Or stamp me with her hooves. Deer have no tact, I swear. Not even if you were to give them your organic apple. Either way, the apple remained in my backpack with my strawberry SoyJoy, and the deer meandered its way through campus.

Lately I've been spending more time reading books than doing homework. It's not completely terrible, honest. I'm operating on minimum efficiency, and that's fine by me. I've finished three books since Saturday, but my booklust cannot be satiated. Like cleaning and running away, reading is my way of avoiding unpleasant things. My rational side has been shunted to a dark corner of my brain and is summarily trotted out for things like "class" and "social interaction." I have yet to realize the consequences, good or bad, of my situation, but I'm enjoying it while I can. Maybe someone can convince me of the benefits of accepting responsibility? I would have gladly accepted responsibility in my youth (last week), but since nothing came about, I was left to my own devices. Now I have three (four?) more books under my belt and even less of an ability to interact with people. Go me!

The great escape.

Many of mine and Cara's walking-to-the-bus conversations (convos, if you prefer) involve turning around and running away that day, skipping class and the excitement involved with such a dastardly deed. This has only come close to happening once, and I think it's only a matter of time before we finally suck it up and do something worthwhile with our day. For now, we continue to dutifully clamber on the bus and endure whatever our professors have in store for us. Lately I've found myself completely zoning out in class and thoroughly enjoying my little made up world ("Find your Happy place,"[Happy Gilmore] if you will). Mine looks a little something like this:


A far cry from the basement of the JFSB, if you ask me.

Finally fall.

Fall is my favorite time of the year--the leaves changing, the apples ripening, the air, uh, crisping. Everything about fall is on my list of favorite things: sweaters, warm comforting food, colors, snuggling by a fire, the last camping trip of the year, not to mention extra family time. Today I feel extra blessed because of the rain. (The Pacific Northwest is on my top five places to live for all the rain that area is blessed with.) It's been falling nonstop since I woke up this morning, and I've enjoyed going outside every half hour just to smell the freshness.

Tonight is our bi-annual Girls' Night Out while the boys are at the priesthood session of Conference. We're going to hit up Tai-Pan for a little bit before dinner and shopping. I love that my family has traditions like this, and I can't wait to have my own family and to keep it all going. It's going to be awesome to have my husband and his family join mine in little things like "the women getting together while the men go to priesthood." Some day...

Personality test.

I took the Myers-Briggs personality test that everyone's (i.e. my sister and Janae) been raving about. Here are my results (because I know my mom will love to read it all :] ).

Idealist Portrait of the Counselor (INFJ)

Counselors have an exceptionally strong desire to contribute to the welfare of others, and find great personal fulfillment interacting with people, nurturing their personal development, guiding them to realize their human potential. Although they are happy working at jobs (such as writing) that require solitude and close attention, Counselors do quite well with individuals or groups of people, provided that the personal interactions are not superficial, and that they find some quiet, private time every now and then to recharge their batteries. Counselors are both kind and positive in their handling of others; they are great listeners and seem naturally interested in helping people with their personal problems. Not usually visible leaders, Counselors prefer to work intensely with those close to them, especially on a one-to-one basis, quietly exerting their influence behind the scenes.

Counselors are scarce, little more than one percent of the population, and can be hard to get to know, since they tend not to share their innermost thoughts or their powerful emotional reactions except with their loved ones. They are highly private people, with an unusually rich, complicated inner life. Friends or colleagues who have known them for years may find sides emerging which come as a surprise. Not that Counselors are flighty or scattered; they value their integrity a great deal, but they have mysterious, intricately woven personalities which sometimes puzzle even them.

Counselors tend to work effectively in organizations. They value staff harmony and make every effort to help an organization run smoothly and pleasantly. They understand and use human systems creatively, and are good at consulting and cooperating with others. As employees or employers, Counselors are concerned with people's feelings and are able to act as a barometer of the feelings within the organization.

Blessed with vivid imaginations, Counselors are often seen as the most poetical of all the types, and in fact they use a lot of poetic imagery in their everyday language. Their great talent for language-both written and spoken-is usually directed toward communicating with people in a personalized way. Counselors are highly intuitive and can recognize another's emotions or intentions - good or evil - even before that person is aware of them. Counselors themselves can seldom tell how they came to read others' feelings so keenly. This extreme sensitivity to others could very well be the basis of the Counselor's remarkable ability to experience a whole array of psychic phenomena.

And here are some more results from a different website, in case you're interested:

INFJs are distinguished by both their complexity of character and the unusual range and depth of their talents. Strongly humanitarian in outlook, INFJs tend to be idealists, and because of their J preference for closure and completion, they are generally "doers" as well as dreamers. This rare combination of vision and practicality often results in INFJs taking a disproportionate amount of responsibility in the various causes to which so many of them seem to be drawn.

INFJs are deeply concerned about their relations with individuals as well as the state of humanity at large. They are, in fact, sometimes mistaken for extroverts because they appear so outgoing and are so genuinely interested in people -- a product of the Feeling function they most readily show to the world. On the contrary, INFJs are true introverts, who can only be emotionally intimate and fulfilled with a chosen few from among their long-term friends, family, or obvious "soul mates." While instinctively courting the personal and organizational demands continually made upon them by others, at intervals INFJs will suddenly withdraw into themselves, sometimes shutting out even their intimates. This apparent paradox is a necessary escape valve for them, providing both time to rebuild their depleted resources and a filter to prevent the emotional overload to which they are so susceptible as inherent "givers." As a pattern of behavior, it is perhaps the most confusing aspect of the enigmatic INFJ character to outsiders, and hence the most often misunderstood -- particularly by those who have little experience with this rare type.

Due in part to the unique perspective produced by this alternation between detachment and involvement in the lives of the people around them, INFJs may well have the clearest insights of all the types into the motivations of others, for good and for evil. The most important contributing factor to this uncanny gift, however, are the empathic abilities often found in Fs, which seem to be especially heightened in the INFJ type (possibly by the dominance of the introverted N function).

This empathy can serve as a classic example of the two-edged nature of certain INFJ talents, as it can be strong enough to cause discomfort or pain in negative or stressful situations. More explicit inner conflicts are also not uncommon in INFJs; it is possible to speculate that the causes for some of these may lie in the specific combinations of preferences which define this complex type. For instance, there can sometimes be a "tug-of-war" between NF vision and idealism and the J practicality that urges compromise for the sake of achieving the highest priority goals. And the I and J combination, while perhaps enhancing self-awareness, may make it difficult for INFJs to articulate their deepest and most convoluted feelings.

Usually self-expression comes more easily to INFJs on paper, as they tend to have strong writing skills. Since in addition they often possess a strong personal charisma, INFJs are generally well-suited to the "inspirational" professions such as teaching (especially in higher education) and religious leadership. Psychology and counseling are other obvious choices, but overall, INFJs can be exceptionally difficult to pigeonhole by their career paths. Perhaps the best example of this occurs in the technical fields. Many INFJs perceive themselves at a disadvantage when dealing with the mystique and formality of "hard logic", and in academic terms this may cause a tendency to gravitate towards the liberal arts rather than the sciences. However, the significant minority of INFJs who do pursue studies and careers in the latter areas tend to be as successful as their T counterparts, as it is *iNtuition* -- the dominant function for the INFJ type -- which governs the ability to understand abstract theory and implement it creatively.

In their own way, INFJs are just as much "systems builders" as are INTJs; the difference lies in that most INFJ "systems" are founded on human beings and human values, rather than information and technology. Their systems may for these reasons be conceptually "blurrier" than analogous NT ones, harder to measure in strict numerical terms, and easier to take for granted -- yet it is these same underlying reasons which make the resulting contributions to society so vital and profound.

And finally, the last of it:

Beneath the quiet exterior, INFJs hold deep convictions about the weightier matters of life. Those who are activists -- INFJs gravitate toward such a role -- are there for the cause, not for personal glory or political power.

INFJs are champions of the oppressed and downtrodden. They often are found in the wake of an emergency, rescuing those who are in acute distress. INFJs may fantasize about getting revenge on those who victimize the defenseless. The concept of 'poetic justice' is appealing to the INFJ.

"There's something rotten in Denmark." Accurately suspicious about others' motives, INFJs are not easily led. These are the people that you can rarely fool any of the time. Though affable and sympathetic to most, INFJs are selective about their friends. Such a friendship is a symbiotic bond that transcends mere words.

INFJs have a knack for fluency in language and facility in communication. In addition, nonverbal sensitivity enables the INFJ to know and be known by others intimately.

Writing, counseling, public service and even politics are areas where INFJs frequently find their niche.

Introverted Intuition

Introverted intuitives, INFJs enjoy a greater clarity of perception of inner, unconscious processes than all but their INTJ cousins. Just as SP types commune with the object and "live in the here and now" of the physical world, INFJs readily grasp the hidden psychological stimuli behind the more observable dynamics of behavior and affect. Their amazing ability to deduce the inner workings of the mind, will and emotions of others gives INFJs their reputation as prophets and seers. Unlike the confining, routinizing nature of introverted sensing, introverted intuition frees this type to act insightfully and spontaneously as unique solutions arise on an event by event basis.

Extraverted Feeling

Extraverted feeling, the auxiliary deciding function, expresses a range of emotion and opinions of, for and about people. INFJs, like many other FJ types, find themselves caught between the desire to express their wealth of feelings and moral conclusions about the actions and attitudes of others, and the awareness of the consequences of unbridled candor. Some vent the attending emotions in private, to trusted allies. Such confidants are chosen with care, for INFJs are well aware of the treachery that can reside in the hearts of mortals. This particular combination of introverted intuition and extraverted feeling provides INFJs with the raw material from which perceptive counselors are shaped.

Introverted Thinking

The INFJ's thinking is introverted, turned toward the subject. Perhaps it is when the INFJ's thinking function is operative that he is most aloof. A comrade might surmise that such detachment signals a disillusionment, that she has also been found lacking by the sardonic eye of this one who plumbs the depths of the human spirit. Experience suggests that such distancing is merely an indication that the seer is hard at work and focusing energy into this less efficient tertiary function.

Extraverted Sensing

INFJs are twice blessed with clarity of vision, both internal and external. Just as they possess inner vision which is drawn to the forms of the unconscious, they also have external sensing perception which readily takes hold of worldly objects. Sensing, however, is the weakest of the INFJ's arsenal and the most vulnerable. INFJs, like their fellow intuitives, may be so absorbed in intuitive perceiving that they become oblivious to physical reality. The INFJ under stress may fall prey to various forms of immediate gratification. Awareness of extraverted sensing is probably the source of the "SP wannabe" side of INFJs. Many yearn to live spontaneously; it's not uncommon for INFJ actors to take on an SP (often ESTP) role.

Everyone's invited.

I read this article today for my magazines class because we're talking about religious and gender bias and how to avoid it. The article has to do with some important aspects of my life right now, and it kind of put into words stuff I've been thinking about. Plus, I think that it's always particularly apt to talk about loving everyone better, so I included it here for you all to read. I think a great extension to this talk would be something along the lines of Church members accepting one another, but that's a story for another day...


"Doctrine of Inclusion"
Elder M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles

It may very well have been a beautiful, crisp autumn day like this. The Savior was sitting,
teaching some of His disciples, when a man identified only as "a certain lawyer" stood and asked Him, "Master, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?"

Jesus knew the man's heart and understood the question was a thinly veiled attempt to get Him to say something contrary to the law of Moses.

The Savior responded to the question with two questions of His own: "What is written in the law? how readest thou?"

As you might expect, the lawyer was able to recite the law: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself"

"Thou hast answered right," the Savior said. "This do, and thou shalt live." But the lawyer wasn't satisfied with that. Knowing that there were strict rules and beliefs among the Jews regarding association with those not of the faith, he pressed the Lord for more information, hoping to trap Him in controversy: "And who is my neighbour?" he asked.

It was time, once again, to teach. Jesus drew upon one of His favorite and most effective teaching techniques: a parable, perhaps one of the most-beloved and well-known parables in all of Christendom.

You know the parable, how a man from Jerusalem was on his way to Jericho and fell
among thieves and was left half dead. A certain priest passed by on the other side; neither
did a Levite stop to help. Then Jesus taught:
"But a certain Samaritan, as he journeyed, came where he was: and when he saw him, he had compassion on him,

"And went to him, and bound up his wounds, pouring in oil and wine, and set him on his own beast, and brought him to an inn, and took care of him."

Then Jesus asked the lawyer one more question: "Which now of these three, thinkest thou, was neighbour unto him that fell among thieves?" And the lawyer replied: "He that shewed mercy on him."

Then Jesus delivered His final instruction to the lawyer—and to all who have read the parable of the good Samaritan: "Go, and do thou likewise" (see Luke 10:25-37).

Every time I read this parable I am impressed with its power and its simplicity. But have you ever wondered why the Savior chose to make the hero of this story a Samaritan? There was considerable antipathy between the Jews and the Samaritans at the time of Christ. Under normal circumstances, these two groups avoided association with each other. It would still be a good, instructive parable if the man who fell among thieves had been rescued by a brother Jew.

His deliberate use of Jews and Samaritans clearly teaches that we are all neighbors and that we should love, esteem, respect, and serve one another despite our deepest differences—including religious, political, and cultural differences.

That instruction continues today to be part of the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. In enumerating the key doctrines of the restored Church, Joseph Smith said, while "we claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience," we also "allow all men the same privilege, let them worship how, where, or what they may" (A of F 1:11).

Thankfully, many of our members understand this doctrine and live it during the course of their daily lives. I recently read a news account of a tragic death in a community here in Utah. A grieving young widow was quoted: "We've been overwhelmed by support. We're not Mormon, but the local ward here has been all over us with meals and help and words of comfort. It's been a total outpouring of love, and we appreciate it" (quoted in Dick Harmon, "Former Ute's Death Leaves Wife Coping, Wondering," Daily Herald [Provo, Utah], 11 Aug. 2001, A3).

That's just as it should be. If we are truly disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ, we will reach out with love and understanding to all of our neighbors at all times, particularly in times of need. A recent Church News carried a story of two women who are dear friends, a "Jewish physician from New York and [a] stay-at-home [Latter-day Saint] mom of six from Utah, both a long way from home in Dallas [Texas]."

Our member reported: "If our friendship had been put through a computer matching service, I doubt we would have made it past the first hurdle.

"... A woman with a busy medical practice, I assumed, would have little desire to discuss the color of the hospitality napkins for PTA.

"Funny thing about assumptions—they can cut away the very roots of something that could flourish and grow if given a chance. I am forever grateful that assumptions were east aside" (Shauna Erickson, "Unlikely Friends Sharing a Lifetime," Church News, 18 Aug. 2001, 10).

Perceptions and assumptions can be very dangerous and unfair. There are some of our members who may fail to reach out with friendly smiles, warm handshakes, and loving service to all of their neighbors. At the same time, there may be those who move into our neighborhoods who are not of our faith who come with negative preconceptions about the Church and its members. Surely good neighbors should put forth every effort to understand each other and to be kind to one another regardless of religion, nationality, race, or culture.

Occasionally I hear of members offending those of other faiths by overlooking them and leaving them out. This can occur especially in communities where our members are the majority. I have heard about nanow-minded parents who tell children that they cannot play with a particular child in the neighborhood simply because his or her family does not belong to our Church. This kind of behavior is not in keeping with the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. I cannot comprehend why any member of our Church would allow these kinds of things to happen. I have been a member of this Church my entire life. I have been a full-time missionary, twice a bishop, a mission president, a Seventy, and now an Apostle. I have never taught—nor have I ever heard taught—a doctrine of exclusion. I have never heard the members of this Church urged to be anything but loving, kind, tolerant, and benevolent to our friends and neighbors of other faiths.

The Lord expects a great deal from us. Parents, please teach your children and practice yourselves the principle of inclusion of others and not exclusion because of religious, political, or cultural differences.

While it is true we declare to the world that the fullness of the gospel of Jesus Christ has been restored to the earth through the Prophet Joseph Smith and we urge our members to share their faith and testimonies with others, it has never been the policy of the Church that those who choose not to listen or to accept our message should be shunned or ignored. Indeed, the opposite is true. President Gordon B. Hinckley has repeatedly reminded us of this special obligation that we have as followers of the Lord Jesus Christ.
I quote just one:

"Each of us is an individual. Each of us is different. There must be respect for those differences.

"...We must work harder to build mutual respect, an attitude of forbearance, with tolerance one for another regardless of the doctrines and philosophies which we may espouse. Concerning these you and I may disagree. But we can do so with respect and civility" (Teachings of Gordon B. Hinckley [1997}, 661, 665).

As members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we understand that we are perceived by some to be "a peculiar people" (1 Pet. 2:9). Our doctrines and beliefs are important to us. We embrace them and cherish them. 1 am not suggesting for a moment that we shouldn't. On the contrary, our peculiarity and the uniqueness of the message of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ are indispensable elements in offering the people of the world a clear choice, Neither am I suggesting that we should associate in any relationship that would place us or our families at spiritual risk. We must understand, however, that not everyone is going to accept our doctrine of the Restoration of the gospel of Jesus Christ. For the most part, our neighbors not of our faith are good, honorable people—every bit as good and honorable as we strive to be. They care about their families, just like we do. They want to make the world a better place, just like we do. They are kind and loving and generous and faithful, just like we seek to be. Nearly 25 years ago, the First Presidency declared: "Our message ...isone of special love and concern for the eternal welfare of all men and women, regardless of religious belief, race, or nationality, knowing that we are truly brothers and sisters because we are sons and
daughters of the same Eternal Father" (First Presidency statement, 15 Feb. 1978). That is our doctrine—a doctrine of inclusion. That is what we believe. That is what we have been taught. Of all people on this earth, we should be the most loving, the kindest, and the most tolerant because of that doctrine.

May I suggest three simple things we can do to avoid making others in our neighborhoods feel excluded?

First, get to know your neighbors. Learn about their families, their work, their views. Get together with them, if they are willing, and do so without being pushy and without any ulterior motives. Friendship should never be offered as a means to an end; it can and should be an end unto itself. I received a letter from a woman who recently moved to Utah, a small part of which I quote: "I must tell you, Elder Ballard, that when I greet my neighbors, or if I wave to them, they do not acknowledge my greeting. If I pass them while taking my morning or evening walk, my salutation is not returned. Other people of color consistently express similar negative responses to friendly gestures." If members of the Church are among her neighbors, surely they must know that this should not happen. Let us cultivate meaningful relationships of mutual trust and understanding with people from different backgrounds and beliefs.

Second, I believe it would be good if we eliminated a couple of phrases from our vocabulary: "nonmember" and "non-Mormon." Such phrases can be demeaning and even belittling. Personally, I don't consider myself to be a "non-Catholic" or a "non-Jew." I am a Christian. I am a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. That is how I prefer to be identified—for who and what I am, as opposed to being identified for what I am not. Let us extend that same courtesy to those who live among us. If a collective description is needed, then "neighbors" seems to work well in most cases.

And third, if neighbors become testy or frustrated because of some disagreement with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints or with some law we support for moral reasons, please don't suggest to them—even in a humorous way—that they consider moving someplace else. I cannot comprehend how any member of our Church can even think such a thing! Our pioneer ancestors were driven from place to place by uninformed and intolerant neighbors. They experienced extraordinary hardship and persecution because they thought, acted, and believed differently from others. If our history teachesus nothing else, it should teach us to respect the rights of all people to pcacefully coexist with one another.

I now speak to all those who are not of our faith. If there are issues of concern, let us talk about them. We want to be helpful. Please understand, however, that our doctrines and teachings are set by the Lord, so sometimes we will have to agree to disagree with you, but we can do so without being disagreeable. In our communities we can and must work together in an atmosphere of courtesy, respect, and civility. Here in Utah, a group of concerned citizens formed the Alliance for Unity. This effort has been endorsed by our Church as well as other churches and organizations. One of its purposes is "to seek to build a community where differing viewpoints are acknowledged and valued." Perhaps there has never been a more important time for neighbors all around the world to stand together for the common good of one another.

Just hours before He began the painful physical and spiritual processes of the Atonement, the Savior met with His Apostles to partake of the Feast of the Passover—His Last Supper—and to give them the final instructions He would give them in mortality. Among these teachings is the stirring, life-changing declaration: "A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. "By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another" (John 13:34-35).

That is what Jesus taught His disciples—including "a certain lawyer"—through the parable of the good Samaritan. And that is what He is teaching us today through living prophets and apostles. Love one another. Be kind to one another despite our deepest differences. Treat one another with respect and civility. I know and testify that Jesus is the Christ, our Savior and Redeemer, and I know that He expects all of us to follow His admonition to be better neighbors, to which I testify in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.


M. Russell Ballard, "Doctrine of Inclusion," Ensign, Nov. 2001, 35
2004 Intellectual Reserve, Inc. All rights reserved.

To begin at the end.

I've been needing to write this blog for awhile, so here goes. I was pretty bummed by summer ending. Usually I can motivate myself somehow to be excited for school and new experiences, but I think I could have done with a few more weeks of real freedom. I guess part of my reluctance involved the knowledge that this was my last official summer before "life" begins, with its vast array of jobs and responsibilities. Sigh. But as always, I've dealt with it and moved on.

The school year thus far has proved nothing dramatic--besides meeting some new people and friends (Clarence, Curt, Tusk, et al.)--it's been pretty straightforward. My editing classes are going well and, thanks to the crash course in editing my internship has given me, have been somewhat a review. For my magazine publishing class, we have the chance to work closely with the editors of BYU Magazine; our first two writing assignments are geared toward possible acceptance for publication by them, which I think is really cool. Plus, we get the inside scoop on editorial decisions, upcoming stories and issues, and basically an insider's look at the mag publishing process. They've even created a blog for us to discuss things outside class with the editors. It's awesome. My English class is likewise amazing. The professor, Dr. Talbot, was one of my mentors in England, and his class, which focuses on how English writers appropriated Classical (read Greek and Roman) writers for their own material, is so great. Since Talbot knows both classical Greek and Latin, the class truly is a learning experience. I like his traditional, yet quirky, Oxfordian style, and might take his 495 class this winter that deals with the same subject.

One thing I know I must tell you, and that is how my internship has been an absolute, freaking dream. I never imagined that I would learn or do as much as I have learned and done. Everything from editing apostles' books to writing jacket copy. It's been such a humbling experience that I know I am so lucky to have. Reading as much as I do of others' writing, I am so grateful for the particular skills and talents I was given--to make communication clearer between people is a dream job for me, and I guess I take for granted how easy it comes for me. Not to toot my own horn or anything...

For the second part of this blog, I want to write an apology. I know that sometimes I'm not the easiest person to be around, particularly when I let annoying situations get to me, and to other people that translates into me being mad at them. One thing you should know, is that if I am mad at you, I will either tell you or, most likely, resolve it within myself and move on. But that's not so easy when it comes to things I can't control or let myself become a victim of. If I'm mad and act like I'm ignoring you, chances are I'm just staying away because I know I'm a crappy person to be around at the moment and don't want to do or say anything that will make you mad at me. If I don't open up to you it's for one of a number of reasons: (1) I don't trust you, (2) I don't think it's big enough of a deal to let you in, (3) I don't want to bug you, etc. So don't take it personally; I'm a pretty introspective person anyway and like to think I can handle stuff on my own. So. Crash course in Rachel one-oh-one, right? Haha.

I will fill you in on one thing, though, because I could probably use some external encouragement to fulfill this goal. I've decided to not be so picky when it comes to relationships. And I mean this in the best way possible. I'm not by any means going to date the first guy that walks in the room; all I mean is that I know I can be impossible sometimes with my, uh, requirements, and I know this isn't right. I think it's ridiculous when guys are impossible in their requirements, so this is me jumping off the hypocrisy bandwagon. I need to start accepting the dates I get asked out on, and not worry so much that he wears plaid button-up shirts every Tuesday and Thursday, or if he hasn't heard of Radical Face or Sea Wolf. Ok, so this may take some work. But I guess I'm just tired of finding the "perfect" guy only to find out he doesn't date/has a girlfriend/insert another random issue here. The let down is so much harder at times like those. In a few words, I just need to chill and take things as they come. I'm just tired of relationships being the biggest source of sadness for me in my life. (Well, that and missing England, which is a given constant.)

A final note, and then I'm off. Most of the people who read this blog aren't on MySpace, so I'm re-issuing the plea to you that I made there: I need advice of the musical (and dare I say, the most important) kind.

Every Tuesday and Thursday I spend a lot of time driving in the car, and I am in desperate need of new music to get me through said sojourns. I'd really appreciate your suggestions. Not your souls here, people, just your suggestions.

Or if anyone feels so inclined, sending a carefully crafted mix my way wouldn't be too shabby either. ;) But tell me who you think I should listen to, no matter how eclectic/weird you might think they are.

Thanks loves!

P.S. Persons sending country and/or rap "music" suggestions will be mocked and summarily shunned. Sorry. Kinda.

News, news, news.

On Monday I found out that I got the publishing internship with Deseret Book. I'm really excited to have been chosen out of so many people, and I just want to get down there and start working. My internship begins next Tuesday, August 26, and runs until December 11. The schedule is perfect; I couldn't have planned it better myself. I work every Tuesday and Thursday, 9am-5pm. I haven't decided whether I'm going to take the express bus, a ride of 1 hour 42 minutes, or to drive Jetta to TRAX and then TRAX to the office downtown. I think cost-wise, which is what I care about more than time, the bus is the better choice, because driving Jetta would mean that in addition to paying for the gas to drive from Provo to 90th, I would have to pay for TRAX tickets, which are ridiculously expensive now if you're going to ride it as much as I would. I'm getting a student discount on my bus pass for going to school anyway, and I'm hoping it will apply to the express bus. I get a $1,000 stipend (half now, half at the end), which should help cover any weird costs I run into. In any case, wild horses couldn't keep me away from this internship.

The woman who offered me the library job I applied for at the same time as the internship was really nice about me declining--that's always a weird situation to be in, telling someone you've decided to work somewhere else. But she was great and gave me a few days to think about it and now I feel really good about my decision.

In other news, Cara and I are moving back to Provo next week, maybe on Wednesday, or most likely on Friday. I'm really looking forward to this year, since it's my last one and my classes are going to be awesome. The more I think about it, the more I realize how much I belong in this major/minor, and how maybe this was a large reason why I was supposed to go to BYU. For the longest time I couldn't figure out why I'd ever chosen to attend BYU; it's not that I wasn't against it, it just hadn't crossed my mind. My applications included more of the likes of Westminster, Brown, Dartmouth, Smith, and wonder of all wonders, BYU-Idaho (please, just, really don't ask). But six months after the application frenzy, my parents were dropping me off at U-Hall of Deseret Towers. So you never really know, I guess. None of the other schools I considered have an editing minor or focus. And that's what has kept me here at BYU, even though it took me three years to figure that out. This year is going to be awesome. I'm excited to live with Janae and have my own room again.

This summer has been somewhat hard for me. I've come to realize a lot of things about myself that I'd rather not know. Mainly, I had to learn the difference between hoping and expecting, and that it's never good to do much of the latter. I'm also having to deal with my sudden loss of independece--newsflash, Rachel can't stand to be alone. Go figure. I used to be extremely independent and liked doing my own thing, but I've come to the point where I hate even sleeping alone. Abandonment issues much? Haha... I feel bratty complaining, especially when, for the most part, I have everything I want. But I don't think it's right to have a constant feeling of discontent, and I guess I'm just voicing that.

In better news, I've started writing more on my book I started my freshman year. I get new ideas everyday and it's hard to keep them organized, so I've been writing them down and started to sort them better. We'll see how that turns out. Like Ashley has said, if "that Twilight woman can write a book," what's stopping me?

Need more friends with wings.

So the title of this blog has nothing to do with anything really, except that I was listening to Billy Talent and that was the first line of the song. Anyway, what a freakingly exhausting day this here Tuesday has been. I'm more than a little sad that I'm not in Vancouver/Portland right now, but I'll just have to plan on taking a trip there soon. Instead, today's non-Portland day was brought to you by Rachel's Internship and Job Search 2008. The internship: publishing assistant at Deseret Book. The job: Bibliographer/Researcher at the HBLL.

After a night of fitful, restless sleep, I was jerked crashingly awake this morning by my unfamiliar, very un-summer sounding alarm clock at 7:30. After a shower and quick breakfast, Cara and I left the house for the Trax station. It only took us 20 minutes from the 6400 S. Trax to the Deseret Book corporate office, so we walked around Temple Square for a little bit. My appointment wasn't until 10, and I was really glad to have Cara there with me for support and to keep me from freaking out too much. I think I have some sort of delayed nervousness syndrome because I felt fine about the whole ordeal up until about 20 minutes before my appointment. Cara got on Trax to go read at the Gateway Barnes & Noble (she really is the best sister for going with me like she did), and I walked across the street from Temple Square into the lobby of DB's offices. I told the receptionist that I had an appointment, and then Jolene came down and took me to the office where I was to take my editing/proofreading test. The test wasn't too bad; I was happy I had reviewed my copyediting marks the night before or my life would have really been difficult. About an hour later I gave my test back to Jolene, who then took me to Lisa Mangum's office for the interview. When I met Lisa, I was so relieved. She was extremely nice and down to earth. I felt really comfortable with her and being at the offices. The interview went amazingly well, I thought, and afterwards I left the offices and met Cara at Gateway where we had delicious chicken yakisoba at Edo Japan and a treat from DQ. After lunch we caught Trax back to the car, and stage two of today's adventure began. We drove to Provo (which is seriously 10 degrees hotter than SLC) and I had enough time before my interview to turn in my scholarship contract and walk around campus for a little while. My interview for a Cataloging/Acquisitions--basically data entry--position at the library on campus was for 3, and Cara and I had the funniest time trying to find the office on the 6th floor of the HBLL. I didn't even know that the library had a 6th floor. Evidently, only a certain section of the building has the much-treasured additional floor. I don't know. My interview here also went really well; I guess when you get me around book people, only good things happen. I'm blessed like that. After the interview, Cub and I met up with Janny at her work and got to talk with her about how living together this year is going to rock and about Cara's hamster concerns. And thus ended our Tuesday adventure. We made it home safely and are now enjoying the coolness of an air-conditioned house.

I guess both the internship and the job have pros and cons. In all honesty I'm hoping for the internship because it's right up my alley of where I see my career going the next five years, but the job would be just as valuable in giving me more experience. The next couple of days will tell me more, so until then...

Too much time on my hands.

One of my favorite ways of passing extra time is planning my future house. That may sound weird to some of you, but remember that I know some of you, and what you do is no less weird, right? Right. This hobby stems mostly from a love of real estate and interior design, not from some delusional fantasy that everything posted here will be mine in 1.5 years, along with 2 kids and a hot graphic designer husband. Ahem. Not at all. Tell me what you think of these rooms! They're mostly chosen with this house in mind:



Living Rooms


Bedroom


This one is my favorite--I love the modern and simple feel of platform beds.


Bathroom



Dining Room


My office



Baby Rooms




All designs were found at the Pottery Barn and West Elm websites.

Success!

When I originally added editing as my minor, the only thought going through my naive little head was of me tramping through the swampy jungle of [someone else's] bad grammar and punctuation. Maybe even a little layout design on the side. What I didn't expect was the full-on slap in the face from my dear friend, reality. Come to find out, with only three classes to go before graduation, the editing market is oversaturated and companies can basically pick and choose from thousands of hopeful, half-starved editors. My initial search for an internship seemed only in vain since 3/4 of the companies required at least a year of experience--for an internship--and the rest were internships that only the insane and suicidal would consider. (Sitting in a cubicle in front of a computer for ten hours a day proofreading phone book ads. Think about it. And I like proofreading.) I emerged from my BYU Magazine internship foray with a slightly bruised ego and the beginnings of what I call Doubt as to whether editing was a good job for someone who knew what they wanted in a job. Okay, I calmed down after awhile, only to have my fears resurface this summer when I realized graduation was less than a year away and I had yet to gain the sort of experience an internship provides. My latest attempt to eke some life into my minor was sending a resume to Deseret Book for their fall publishing internship. I thought I had a pretty good chance until after almost three weeks I hadn't heard from anyone and figured I was once again looked over for those with more experience (experience! where does one gain this all-important "experience"?). But today I checked my email in what I thought would be another fruitless delving into the emptiness of my in-box when lo and behold, an email from one Andrea Barker informed me that I was wanted at the Deseret Book offices to take their in-house editing test and to have an interview. Yay! I'm still dealing with the fact that they want me to come in on the 12th, which will be Day 2 of due diligence recon in Portland and Vancouver with Kristin, Cub, and mom's company. I told Andrea that I'm not available those days, but would be back the 15th, so let's hope that that sits kosher with her. I sure hope so. My minor and I can't take anymore "experienced" people edging in on our racket.

Guilty as charged.

The combination of the past two days of cloudiness and listening to a lot of Brand New has caused me to think about something, well, someone from my past that I'd promised myself I'd never go back to mentally. So far, so good. But lately I can't get him out of my mind and it's driving me crazy. I feel so guilty for how things ended between us, and now I want more than anything to make it right. Yet I know if I were even to approach this person, all guards would come up and it might even make things worse. And the thing that sucks the most was the fact that when I look back on how we were together, I can honestly say we had no problems, and probably never would have, if it hadn't been for my own neurotic and OCD mind. He was so kind and honest to me, and really the only person I've been able to tell anything to or discuss anything with without feeling like I'd be judged. Most of the time, like now, it makes me physically sick to think how I treated him. Hence the blocking. But not anymore. I feel I deserve everything I get and I hope that someday I can know he's forgiven me. Until then, I don't think I'll ever feel right.

Long time, no blog.

I've felt like it's been too long since I've written a real blog so I'm grateful that this past weekend is giving me the opportunity. On Friday Cara and I cleaned the house, did the laundry and went to the grocery store. The fun doesn't end there, don't worry. We braved the crowds at Cafe Rio for dinner, where we were surrounded by the smell of bad breath that seemed to be coming from the woman next to us. Said delicate female was wearing the classiest of tie-dyed swimming tank tops (you know, the kind people wore back in the 80s to the pool yet for some reason some people persist in bringing them out when the temperature even inches above 60 degrees? Yeah) and the smell was definitely a wafting one, hence our blaming her as the source. One delicious steak burrito later, we found ourselves in Jetta heading for Cafe Rio's Friday night complement, Cold Stone. When we got in the car we realized, to our perplexity and disgust, that the source of the old man's bad breath smell was actually our cups from the River Cafe and not the aforesaid woman. Oops. I don't know what the secret ingredient is that they use in making their cups, but it doesn't smell legal and is definitely not non-toxic. Anyway, we went to Cold Stone, then to Blockbuster to look for the movie Penelope, which stars two of my favorite actors, Christina Ricci and James McAvoy. Sadly, the ol' B-Bust did not come through for us, so we went home and watched Be Kind, Rewind with the fam. Jack Black was a freaking riot, as usual, and Friday ended on a good note.

My family is very outdoorsy so we decided to go hiking on Saturday morning. Having stayed up late the night before, there was no small amount of mumbles and grumbles as we got ready to go. But once we were on the road and in the mountains everything calmed down and we really enjoyed ourselves. My dad, who is pretty much professional when it comes to finding cool places for us to hike/camp/boat/have fun (but not at finding buffets, hahaha...family joke), took us to a new place called Deseret Peak out west past the Salt Lake and Tooele and Grantsville.
The hike wasn't too bad; we went up about 2 miles, ate lunch and then hiked back down. We plan on returning again and hiking the last mile and a half to the lake--we were all pretty tired this time around. That night we went to dinner at Sampan, which was delicious as usual. Cara and I went to Smith's because she wanted to get some presents for Clarence, who is moving to Utah from Montana tomorrow. I'm really excited to finally meet him! It's so weird to think that my whole family has met him and I haven't. I know he's awesome though because Cara wouldn't be dating him if he wasn't. But yeah, I'm really excited for them because the whole long-distance thing has sucked so it'll be great for them to finally live near each other.

After Smith's we went to good ol' Wood Ranch park and hung out on my Stonehenge picnic blanket. Jess met up with us after a while and told us about everything going on with her; it was good to see her after so many months. Today was the usual church going where we had a really good lesson about obedience. I know it's something I need to take to heart more actively. It's one thing to be doing good on the big things like going to church, but I need to work on little things like not being bratty and ungrateful. One of the best things about today was that my Aunt Nonnie, who's visiting from Denver, was nice and brought my grandma and her husband to our house from the nursing home so they could eat dinner with us. Cub, mom, and I made a sirloin roast, mashed potatoes with gravy, broccoli and carrots, apple salad, green salad, and rolls. Kinda delish, I'd say. It was good to see my grandma and let her get out of her room for a little bit. Nonnie also let her new little Yorkie stay with me tonight. Her name is Chloe and she is absolutely darling.


She's four months old and such a good dog. We took a nap together today and then went for a walk with Abby, who is ginormous compared to Chloe. So that's this weekend in a blogshell. Tomorrow I have to run errands with Derek for his Eagle Scout project, but other than that it shouldn't be too bad. This week's going to be crazy, what with getting ready to go camping and all, but I'll try to find time to write again. I have some books I want to recommend. So until then :)

Poetry, just because.

The Builder

I chose my own illusion,
from frozen salt I made its likeness--
I based my time on the great rain
and, even so, I am still alive.

It is true that my long mastery
divided up the dreams
and without knowing there arose
walls, separations, endlessly.

Then I went to the coast.

I saw the beginnings of the ship,
I touched it, smooth as the sacred fish--
it quivered like the harp of heaven,
the woodwork was clean,
it had the scent of honey.
And when it did not come back,
the ship did not come back,
everyone drowned in his own tears
while I went back to the wood
with an ax naked as a star.

My faith lay in those ships.

I have no recourse but to live.

-Pablo Neruda

My new favorite hobby.

Music. Reading. Writing. Swimming. Art. Fashion. Next to be added to my pantheon of hobbies is cooking. I've recently been hired as the Executive Chef of Chez Spohn, and let me tell you, I've taken up the challenge with relish. I've always loved to cook, but have never had to do so for five people. It's so relaxing and fulfilling to me to cook good food for people and to have them enjoy it. And the best part is that I know I'm learning skills that I'll have for the rest of my life. The domestic goddess in me has been screaming to be let out, and my parents have gratefully conceded. Let's face it, I didn't give them much of a choice. Now if only I could convince them to let me decorate our new house...

Favorite website of the week: Williams-Sonoma. The utensils! The baking dishes! The gadgets that only Emeril knows how to use! It's heaven.

We'll be right back after these messages.

The first blog of July! To be continued after Florida...I know I've been a class-A slackerton. So far I have three blog drafts saved but haven't had the time to flesh 'em out like they deserve. Here's a preview: Be prepared for one blog started in London called "Oil Dependency," another titled "Foul Phrases," and finally, "The Day Humanity Melted." Patience, friends.

Home sweet...home.

Long story short: I flew back from London last Thursday. :(
I'm missing it more than I thought I would. Even little things like wanting to walk along the Thames to the Tate Modern, or going to a random concert or play make me a little teary-eyed. I would even ride the Underground with all of its sauna-like qualities if it meant being in London again. The situation was not helped today by my watching DCFC's video of "I Will Possess Your Heart." It has many scenes of London and Paris that are very familiar to me. I miss walking down the pavement to Kensington Gardens and having to watch out for crazy cab drivers. I miss the rubbish. I miss seeing Roman ruins, a medieval church, and a modern sky rise within the same block. I miss the rain and the clouds in the morning, and the sun on Westminster Bridge in the evening. I miss my ward and the little kids from primary.

I think it's just going to take time to get acclimated back into SLC's rhythm. Because I really did throw myself headfirst into London and it's been a little bit of a culture shock to be home. But I'm sure that the jet-lag doesn't help with things. It's getting better though; yesterday was a peaceful, quiet day. I woke up at 8 and made Amish baked oatmeal with strawberries for everyone, and then snuggled Cara until it was time to get ready for church. After church we took Abby for a walk and then sat outside talking about our trip to Orlando coming up in two days. Today I've been working on getting my pictures organized. Thanks to Kristin's Snapfish know-how, my pictures are being put into an accessible format for the masses. I'll let you all know when and how to view them when they're ready. Au demain...

High-waisted skirts.

I am loving these outfits from Anthropologie. They are everything I love about spring fashion. Oh to have a life with unlimited cash...

The winding up.

Okay so I lied. I have yet another blog to write before I leave London. I know, you're all so happy and are now flinging open your windows to shout hallelujahs to the wondering streets below. I can picture it now.

Today we went on a nine-mile country walk in Kent with Brother Chittock. He's a pretty awesome old guy, one of those spry types that never fails to warm my heart with the possibility of aging with dignity. He lived through the Blitz and spoke to us on Tuesday about what it was like. Feel free to peruse my history blog (it's the one marked "My History of Britain blog") to learn more about the Blitz. It's a charming chapter in British history, no doubt.

The walk took us through villages, poppy and wheat fields and a driving range. I wanted to pick up a golf ball for my dad, but was scared to do so after we all received the "It's Stealing" speech from Bro. Chittock's brother, Ron. So I refrained, with the help of one Kristin Lowe, to whom I now owe the salvation of my soul. Ever the friend, Kristin is. We ate lunch/took a nap amongst the ruins of a Norman castle and then walked some more to a farmer's market, the best I've been to so far. I bought Kentish Lavender ice cream, which tasted more appealing than it sounds, and also a bottle of local apple juice. I'm definitely digging the farmer's markets here and want to look into what Utah has to offer when I get home.

Speaking of home, yes, I will be returning, even if unwillingly. I am excited for a possible internship though. It will involve copy writing for a skincare company, and since health is a major interest of mine I feel this will be a great opportunity. Particularly since the last two interns were hired eventually. I've also been accosted by a professor of mine from last semester, the somewhat pedantic and always self-effacing (sarcasm alert) Lance Larsen, official Poet-in-Residence of BYU. He has personally invited me to take a graduate poetry workshop that he'll be conducting this fall. I feel a little overwhelmed and appreciative of him considering me for this since I'm only an undergraduate, but at the same time I can't help but doubt his sincerity. I wonder if he only wants to fill his class. This is the professor that awarded me the Academy of American Poets prize, which means he's only read one poem of mine, leading me to wonder if he has any idea of what he's getting himself into by this vote of confidence. But I am considering it. I'm only taking three classes this fall anyway, and I might as well explore this poetry thing further, if for nothing else than the experience and networking that Dr. Larsen has to offer. We'll see. I've taken his advice and have been reading as much of 20th century poetry as possible, as well as have been writing. Mostly ideas and outlines of poems rather than the things themselves, but it's a start.

Oh, such a drama-fraught life I lead. Haha...not really. I'm enjoying every day and am so happy with everything right now. Of course I have aspects of my life that I wish were different, mostly concerning the problems of other people that I'm sad they have to deal with, but for the most part, I wouldn't wish anything different of what I'm doing right now. I'm a little flustered and excited at the prospect of being graduated this time next year and starting the next stage of my life, i.e. career. Two girls on the program right now are graduated and this was a last little hurrah for them, and I can already see myself in their shoes in the not so distant future. And I can't wait.

Last blog in London, I think.

Things are getting really crazy around here now that the term is winding down and we're going to be going home next week, but I think I should write one more blog from London. Here's a quick rundown of this week:

Monday
I went to my last English class where we discussed Milton and Paradise Lost, some George Herbert, and a little bit of the unconquerable John Donne. I also started finishing some of my blogs for history because I wanted to get them done this week so next week would be free to enjoy my last few days in London.

Tuesday
I finished some more blogs, and then went to the Churchill Museum and War Cabinet Rooms with my history class. The rooms were pretty impressive since everything is basically the same way it was when World War II ended. It was an eye-opener to think of how hard everyone had to fight to keep the Germans from invading during the Blitz.

After the museum I wandered home through St. James's Park and did some more blog work. After dinner I went to Hairspray with a bunch of people; it was so amazing! The energy was fantastic and a lot of people were dancing by the end. It was everything West End show should be: an involved audience, good music and energy and talent, etc.

Wednesday
We made our last day trip out to Blenheim Palace and Oxford. Blenheim Palace was beautiful--what Stourhead had in gardens, Blenheim has in house. Movies like Harry Potter and Indiana Jones (think Nazi book-burning rally) have had scenes filmed there. I would definitely go back someday to explore the grounds some more.




Oxford was, in a word, fabulous. I definitely prefer it to Cambridge. I'll post some pictures to explain everything we saw.
The Radcliffe Camera.

The gate tower of Christ Church College, which we eventually went into.

The main quadrangle of Christ Church College.

The Great Hall of Christ Church College, as seen in Harry Potter.


A view of All Souls' College from the tower of the university church.

The famous Blackwell's bookstore has a room called the Norrington Room, in which 160,000 books are available on 3 miles of shelves. Buahahaaa...

One entrance into the Bodleian Library. I would love to be a student here just to be able to use this library.

My personal favorite: The Eagle and Child pub, where C.S. Lewis and J.R.R. Tolkien met with their literary group, The Inklings.

Other notable happenings in Oxford included drinking a delicious peach shake and wandering around cobbled, narrow streets, and buying a sweatshirt and two t-shirts. Yay for Oxford.